This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 30th, 2007 at 12:00 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
Vicious Cycle
Jonathan and I had a breakthrough last night.
Someone at church asked what our prayer requests are. Jonathan asked the man to pray for his back and for me to be able to relax. And in that moment I realized something. The way we work together (or don’t) is what is making me think I can’t rest. Basically, I’ve taken the lead. I’ve felt like, well, if he doesn’t step in I’ll just take over. And (come to find out) he thought, well, if she’s going to take over, I don’t need to step in.
So I told him how much I NEED him to be my leader. God made him to direct his family and He made me to help him. I can make a list like nobody’s business but I can’t take the pressure of getting us to Tanzania. So I handed off the responsibility to Jonathan and he gladly took it.
Everything that needs to get done may not happen the way I’d necessarily like or on my preferred timeline but I do know it will get done, if it’s truly important. And if it doesn’t get done, life will go on. I trust my husband completely and I’m glad to take that load off my shoulders that I should never have put there in the first place.
I’ll probably being doing just as much as I have been already but without dragging around the weight of making sure we’re BOTH on task. I’ll help all I can but the ultimate responsibility isn’t on me anymore. And it really isn’t on Jonathan either. As long as we’re following God and being obedient, He will take us where He’s leading. And that’s the ultimate source of peace. He is faithful to do more than we can imagine.