Through the Seasons

All by Myself

I really like being alone.  I don’t know why and it makes me sound so unsociable.  I’m really not.  I guess it’s just part of my personality and sometimes I even forget I need this kind of time.

Jonathan left a few minutes ago for his doctor’s appointment (it’s Wednesday afternoon).  Once he was gone I looked around and thought, “Okay.  I need to clean up our lunch dishes and do my Bible study homework.”  I would do the same thing if he had stayed here but I think it would have felt differently.  When I started doing my little chores I felt a sense of relaxation… release… peacefulness… 

And I love to be with Jonathan.  We’re together all the time and if we’re apart too long I go through withdrawals.  And it’s not like I want to be alone 24/7 but when I do have some of that kind of time here and there I am better when I am around people or in crowds.  (Crowds are the worst for me.  I prefer to be one-on-one with people.) 

Having that moment of feeling “all by myself” made me want it on a more consistent basis.  Maybe my last few weeks of pregnancy should include a good half hour a week or something of just being alone.  I feel like it clears out my head and emotions.  It’s a very hard feeling to explain but most other introverts can relate, I’m confident.

But my question is this:  After Asher comes, how long will it be until I have any alone time again?  Hmmm…